My name is Xanthe Wyse. Diagnosed bipolar 1 disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Last video I had a vent and expressed intense emotion including anger. Very rare for me as I have the shutdown presentation of PTSD which includes shutdown emotions. This is because I get triggered by intense emotions.
I went to see Wonder Woman 84 (WW84). I felt intense emotion at times, partly because of the music and some themes, just like when I saw the first movie in 2017 during a massive mania episode.
In my mania, I started to believe I had powers like Wonder Woman and that I was a goddess. My painting of Devine, fire goddess is a fantasy character as composite of myself and Wonder Woman (both Lynda Carter and Gal Godot) plus my character in my novel Pet Purpose.
It’s quite common in bipolar mania to believe you’re someone you’re not. Delusions of grandeur.
I painted a self-portrait, Painting Courage which went into an art exhibition but after the exhibition it has gone back into a cupboard. I don’t actually like it very much as it’s very ‘constricted’ in style trying to do things the ‘proper’ way. I prefer painting mood instead – feel much more freedom doing things my own way. Messy, vibrant, original, intense, colourful.
Wonder Woman’s lasso compelling to tell the truth has appeared in some of my art in small ways.