Sonic commits double homicide and gives Dr. Robotnik PTSD

Sonic was arrested and later sentenced to death by electric chair. his final words were “GOTTA GO FAST” followed by a attempt to escape, needless to say he is… was not faster than electricity. Dr. Robotnik attempted to save the two victims but in the end could not beat the speed of the blue hedge hog. He is now seeing a therapist for Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder. The US Government is currently investigating the origin of the “Blue Devil” as many are calling it. Some theorists say it could have been a Chinese or Russian military experiment or a blue furry on cocaine. The city of San Diego have released no further information on the topic. In other news a farmer in Kentucky called local police about an incident involving a man in a purple dinosaur suit harassing his children from the roof of his house. police detective Bobby Boyega thinks this could be connected to last Tuesday’s incident were a grown man dressed as a blue cat climbed to the top of the Empire State Building and proceeded to throw his own feces onto the pedestrians below.

Source: Youtube